Recently my mum had an operation, a fairly serious one she got through the operation well and is beginning to recover however it has really got me reflective, reflective on my Mum and the amazing mother that she is, reflecting on my childhood and all the events that have shaped me as a person, and as a mother.
I think back to the events, the memories that are imprinted in my mind and I wonder when my kids grow up what memories are the ones that are going to shape them.
As I get older the words that are spoken fade, the Good and the bad but what doesn’t fade is the feelings... The feeling of joy, love that mum showed us as kids, the home cooked food, the way she tucked us in at night. The way that she supported us in all our endeavours, the way she would meet us at the end of our shift at Safeway and walk us home. My mum worked whilst I was growing up but I never thought of her as a working mum, its only now that I am a mother myself with my own business that I realise the hard work she put in, heading off to work nightshift whilst we were sleeping, arriving in time to make us breakfast in the morning. I never realised the sacrifices she made, but I do remember her teaching us Cards, I remember weekends spent doing puzzles, going for long walks together along the beach. Her instilling a love of reading in us.
I remember her gentle rebukes when we did the wrong thing, not in anger but in love.
I remember thinking that I could be, do anything that I wanted as Mum believed I could, but I also knew that it took work and she made sure we did. Homework was a priority, but family came first.
What will my children remember?
Will they remember me playing with them, teaching them cards, going for walks around the lake, doing puzzles, or will they remember me sitting by the computer tolling away.
Will they remember the way I walk them to bed, the cuddles in the morning, the way I make their lunches with the fun notes, the useless facts about Australia and the world around them.
Will they remember the way I am already a taxi service running them from swimming, Badminton, Guitar, Tae kwon do. Teaching them to be part of the community around them.
Will they remember the fun holidays, the impromptu trips interstate? Will it teach them a love of travel as I have, the desire to learn more about the world around us, and the different communities within it.
Will they remember the moments of frustration, trying to get them to clean their room, unstack the dishwasher, feed the dog? Or will this shape them into people with good work ethics, the drive to get the job done. Will they feel like I did, as being gently rebuked in love, not anger!
Or is it more than that….. Will they remember the way that I love them, treasure them, each as individuals. When the music fades and we are left with our memories what will they remember, what will they treasure?